DILLWEED

2006 Oscar picks

2006-03-04T22:38:00.000-06:00

Even though I haven't blogged on Dillweed in a year, here are this year's picks:

Best Supporting Actress
Will win: Amy Adams - Junebug
Should win: Frances McDormand - North Country (I didn't actually see the movie, which looked awful, but I always like her
Should have been nominated: Maria Bello - A History of Violence

Best Supporting Actor
Will win: George Clooney - Syriana
Should win: Paul Giamatti - Cinderella Man (Not for this rancid crap but to make up for the travesty of not being nominated for Sideways last year)
Should have been nominated: Jeffrey Wright - Syriana or Broken Flowers

Best Actress
Will win: Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line
Should win: Reese Witherspoon - Walk the Line
Should have been nominated:

Best Actor
Will win: Philip Seymour Hoffman - Capote
Should win: Joaquin Phoenix - Walk the Line
Should have been nominated: Tony Leung - 2046, Bill Murray - Broken Flowers

Best Original Screenplay
Will win: George Clooney & Grant Heslov - Good Night, and Good Luck
Should win: George Clooney & Grant Heslov - Good Night, and Good Luck
Should have been nominated:

Best Adapted Screenplay
Will win: Larry McMurtry & Diana Ossana - Brokeback Mountain
Should win: Larry McMurtry & Diana Ossana - Brokeback Mountain
Should have been nominated:

Best Director
Will win: Ang Lee - Brokeback Mountain
Should win: Ang Lee - Brokeback Mountain
Should have been nominated: Wong Kar-Wai - 2046, David Cronenberg - A History of Violence

Best Picture
Will win: Brokeback Mountain
Should win: Munich
Should have been nominated: 2046, A History of Violence

The best 5 movies I saw last year:
2046
A History of Violence
Munich
Capote
Brokeback Mountain

Oscar picks

2005-02-27T14:38:00.000-06:00

Quick before they start:

Best Supporting Actress
Will win: Cate Blanchett, The Aviator
Should win: Natalie Portman, Closer
Should have been nominated: Cate Blanchett, Life Aquatic

Best Supporting Actor
Will win: Morgan Freeman, Million Dollar Baby
Should win: Clive Owen, Closer
Should have been nominated:

Best Actress
Will win: Hilary Swank, Million Dollar Baby
Should win: Hilary Swank, Million Dollar Baby
Should have been nominated: Julie Delpy, Before Sunset

Best Actor
Will win: Jamie Foxx, Ray
Should win: Clint Eastwood, Million Dollar Baby
Should have been nominated: PAUL GIAMATTI, Sideways (DUH!)

Best Original Screenplay
Will win: John Logan, The Aviator
Should win: Charlie Kaufmann, Eternal Sunshine
Should have been nominated: Quentin Tarantino, Kill Bill 2

Best Adapted Screenplay
Will win: Alexander Payne & xxx, Sideways
Should win: Richard Linklater et al, Before Sunset
Should have been nominated:

Best Director
Will win: Martin Scorsese, The Aviator
Should win: Martin Scorsese, The Aviator
Should have been nominated: Michel Gondry, Eternal Sunshine

Best Picture
Will win: The Aviator
Should win: Sideways
Should have been nominated: Before Sunset

The Grudge, and many others...

2004-10-25T23:13:00.000-05:00

Howdy, it's been a long, a long time. I got a pile of movies I've torn through, so each review will have to be quick. I thought I'd pair up movies in each mini-review. Yeee-haa!

The Grudge/Ju-on. The first is the American remake of the second. Usually, you might expect "re-make" to mean "piece of shit," but not this one, son. This one's the real-squeeze Coté's hand off-deal. The American version of The Grudge/Ju-on is good stuff. Don't let Buffy scare you off.

As Kim pointed out, there is a lot of repeat between the originals and the re-make...but she almost ground my arm into a pulp even at the mere reflection of one of those pale ghosts.

My advice: see the American one while it's in the theatres, and rent Ju-on for that week long, remote cabin trip you're planning on having.

Alamo Drafthouse at The Village/Alamo Drafthouse at Lake Creek. The Lake Creek one is more spacious, and the seats are more comfortable. How 'bout them sittin' tables at Lake Creek? I've finally decided that the food at both sucks soggy pig-titty. That Red Stripe ain't so bad though...

Both of them are OK, but the Village seems like it has more hipsters...for better or worse. And, Jesus, what the fuck is a "Lake Creek"? It's either one or the other, bubba, can't be both in God's country.

Cold Mountain/Sweet Home Alabama. Look, we're members of Netflix here. We see a lot of movies. Every-now-and-then, something like Sweet Home Alabama sneaks in. But, it goes well with another movie about the South -- both with plenty of folks in confederate uniforms -- Cold Mountain. Sure, the drama one is better than the comedy...well, you could say a lot better. I guess with Alabama, you get to see what all that suffering in Cold Mountain was for. Yay the South!

(Did anyone else think it was weird that the two lead actors in Cold Mountain, a movie about the American Civil War were from the Commonwealth? Next thing you know one of them Queen worshipers is going to make a movie about the Revolution.)

I'd see Cold Mountain if you were hankering for a drama, and I'd start a Civil War if your movie renting partner suggested getting Sweet Home Alabama.

Shaun of the Dead/Matrix: Revolutions. This one's easy:

- if you haven't seen Shaun of the Dead yet, you should be dead yourself. You'll die laughing! (No, really, it is a good movie.)

- the other one...I still don't get it. Programs? Do you think when they were filming this all the actors kept saying, "this is so dumb...but, Jesus, I love that green, baby!"

Gandhi/Man Bites Dog. I knew this guy in college who, at one point, was obsessed with the word, and concept of dichotomy. I have this vivid memory of him talking really fast, for like 3 hours, where he said "dichotomy" like every 5th word. I think every 3rd word was Nietzsche.

I hadn't seen either of these movies in a long time. That Ben Kingsley -- wha-baam! -- there's an actor. If you're in the mood for a movie that has an intermission in it (I guess this was before the "pause" button), check Gandhi out: any man who can make his wife happy to clean the bathroom knows what's up.

I think I feel asleep the first time, long ago, when I watched Man Bites Dog. If you need your violent French fix, I'd check out La Haine first, and then this 'un.

Garden State

2004-08-25T22:06:00.000-05:00

(2004, Zach Braff, very good, 281) I was surprise how good a file this was. Portman and Braff really have great chemistry. I would say it's a romantic comedy with a lot more depth. Braff's script flows well during the first two acts. The ending seems to be a little off but it does affect the overall film much. Some great dialogue too. Check it out. P.S. Everytime I see Natalie Portman in something other than Star Wars she is excellent. I think it shows how bad Lucas is doing with some great talent.

The Manchurian Candidate

2004-08-24T18:45:00.000-05:00

(2004, Jonathan Demme, 271, Good) All around, a solid film. Well acted, well written, and good performances. They tell you a little to much about the plot too soon. I would like more clues and less explicit knowledge in the first act. Denzel does a nice job and is very believable in this roll. The plot and script were very tight. Most everything happens for a reason and overall the script is well connected. Check it out.

The Village

2004-07-31T22:39:00.000-05:00

(M. Night Shyamalan, 2004, 130)

A dopey disappointment. Afterwards, there was a discussion whether it was better than Signs or not. I guess I was the only one that thought Signs was better. That movie was a dumb guy's Ordet. This one was a dumb guy's 2-hour Twilight Zone episode.

Bourne Supremacy

2004-07-28T23:42:00.000-05:00

(Paul Greengrass, 2004, 315, very good)

If you liked Bourne Identity, then you'll like Bourne Supremacy. Matt Daemon reprises his roll as the super spy Jason Bourne. The movie has excellent action just like the first with some great fight scenes. More interesting is to see how Bourne applies his spy tactics. He is again always one step ahead of the people chasing him. Joan Allen also turns in a nice performance as the CIA agent tracking Bourne. One of the best films, I have seen all year.

Training is over movie goers, this is a live environment, and you are a go to see this movie. Make sure to check this one out in the theatres.

Anchorman

2004-07-28T22:27:00.000-05:00

(Adam McKay, 2004, very good)

Will Ferrell and Fred Willard in one movie. And Steve Carell too. The only thing that'd make this movie any better is if it had Bill Murray in it. That'd be a combination for best comedy ever.

That aside, highlights include:

"It's so hot! ...milk was a bad choice."
An excellent Planet of the Apes ode/reference.
More oaths to Norse and Greek Gods than you can count.
"The Germans discovered it in 1904, and they called it "San Diego", which in German means 'whale's vagina.'"
Brian Fantana: [speaking of a musk] They've done studies, you know. Sixty percent of the time it works every time.
Ron Burgundy: ...That doesn't make any sense, Brian.
"[on the phone] Well, really, I don't know where he would get his hands on German Pornography... but really, as adults, its not like we haven't seen our share of pornography in... Oh you haven't? Well, neither have I, I was just joking... listen, I have to go, we'll talk about this later, Sister Margaret."

And so on, and so forth.

In summary, go see it. And if it's hot, remember, milk will be a bad choice.

All the Real Girls

2004-07-20T22:50:00.000-05:00

(2003, David Gordon Green, very good)

(Note: I've decided to eschew the Kelvin rating scale in favor of "stinks," "ok," "good," "very good," and "awesome." Or words along those lines. Having detested most natural science since about the ripe old age of 3 months -- I had a terrible Gerber experience -- I can never remember what those numbers mean, so I'm always looking up the ratings I've given past movies.)

I don't usually like movies that just end all the sudden with no resolution, but if this movie ended with a resolution, it wouldn't have been as good. In fact, All the Real Girls really fits the "real" part of the title: everything about it seems like realism cinema. I don't know if that phrase means anything, I just mean to say it seems like a much more true to life movie than say, Mystic Pizza, or, on the positive side, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

The main plot -- which will sound too cheesy if I summarize it -- is laced through-out with an excellent sub-character-plot, that of Bust Ass. Without a doubt, a whole movie could be made out of just this guy. As Chip's pointed out, the deleted scenes have some of the best Bust Ass, e.g.:

Bust Ass: Will you have sex with me?
Lady in bar: No. You just don't get it do you?
Bust Ass: What?
Lady: I'm your cousin! How do you think grandma would feel?!
Bust Ass: Hey, come on!
Lady (walking away): Fuck you!
Bust Ass: Hey, just don't tell my mother.
Lady: I'll tell grandma and your mother.
Bust Ass (drinking beer, muttering to himself): Christmas is fucked.

That's not it exactly, but you get the idea. Maybe if they threw in a Jay and Silent Bob cameo, along with some Ronnie Dobbs, it'd be even better.

Admittedly, it is a romance, so if you don't like those, or you're not into the speed of lackadaisical movies, you might prefer The Untouchables, wherein folks actually do get their heads bashed in.

Spiderman

2004-07-20T21:09:00.000-05:00

(2004, Sam Raimi, 62)

So far Spiderman has managed to pull in just over $300 million. I would say the general public seems to like it. The critics also seem to agree. Over at Rotten Tomatoes is scored Fresh with a score of 93%.

So let me be the lone dissenting voice in all the Spiderman hoopla. I for one thought it stunk. The effects were weak. They didn't look realistic at all. They felt way to cartoonish. The villain octopus guy was also weak. Then we have the heart felt melodrama in the middle. Peter has lost faith in himself, oh I am so sad. He has to have real jobs and gets fired, oh I am so sad. He can't go out with Mary Jane, oh I am so sad.

Of course though, there is the whole "there is a hero in all of us" plot point as well. I didn't know we were watching an after school special. How about some anti-drug ads or some reading to your children Public Service Announcements, while were at it.

Several people have said "Spiderman is the best comic/superhero film ever made." Well, I didn't know that we're now grading on a curve. Even if we were I still do not see how this film is any better than say X-Men, Dare Devil, or for that matter Superman I.

If you haven't seen it yet, then you didn't miss anything.

Posted by Random

Suicide Club (Jisatsu Circle)

2004-06-29T21:28:00.000-05:00

(2002, Shion Sono, 150)

Unless you're like Chip -- and now me -- and like Japanese weird-horror, this one may not be for you. Roll Call!

54 school girls jump in front of a train.
Bag with a roll of sewn together skin.
A classic Japan-mullet.
Lady cutting off her own fingers (above).
Blood spraying everywhere.
Japanese police getting way too effected by their gorey work.
Uniformed do-nothings getting freaked out.
Computers and cell phones.

What this movie is missing is utter freak-out mode: like kids meowing and ghosts being solid to the touch with scary ass glowing eyes. Maybe if our man "K.K." had done this one we'd have some haunting moments like those...like a blurry guy with a black hood just sitting in the middle of a room on a computer screen...man, still creepy!

But, as you can see from the above roll call, it's pretty good stuff if you've seen all the horror/gore movies and want something else. There's even a subliminal message (sub?) plot.

To be honest, I don't really "get it" beyond the typical "oh, I'm so sad that people are no longer 'connected' to each other like they were in my far off fantasy land of the past where people died at 30, while the rich and powerful treated everyone like dogs! Oh, if only I could be connected to other people, like when my ancestors collected cow shit together in the War Lords fields. Oh, I might just kill myself instead." (I'm a little cynical about all that hooey.)

Once again, I'm going to have to do some serious aruspicy with The Apple Dumpling Gang, and see if Mr. Limpet or that miniature-golf fella can help me figure this shit out.

Fahrenheit 9/11

2004-06-28T23:53:00.000-05:00

(Michael Moore, 2004, 200)

The first 2/3 are very funny due almost purely to genius editing. The last 1/3 felt like I was being beaten with a dead horse. Guess what, folks-- I don't have to hear over and over how terrible it is that civilians and servicemen are dead. I got it the first time. If you want to hear what I think content-wise, talk to mr. chippy.

Dodgeball

2004-06-21T09:08:00.000-05:00

(2004, Rawson Marshall Thurber, 270)

Matt: "So, you'll have to tell us: was Dodgeball worth it?"
Cote': "Sure..."
Matt: "Really?"
Cote': "Oh yeah."

Everyone will be excited to learn that Rawson Marshall Thurber also directed and wrote the beloved Terry Tate, Office Linebacker series.

The movie was quite good. I'd go see it. I mean, like I said, the directory did the Terry Tate stuff. 'Nuff said.

Update: apparently, Dodgeball kicked everyone's ass this weekend:

The Jackie Chan (news) remake "Around the World in 80 Days," reportedly budgeted at $110 million, opened at No. 9 with just $6.8 million for the weekend. The film was financed by Denver billionaire Philip Anschutz as part of a plan to make family-friendly projects.
Unfortunately for him and domestic distributor Walt Disney Co., the low-concept antics of "Dodgeball" held more appeal. The $20 million sports satire stars Vaughn and Stiller as leaders of rival teams vying for a $50,000 prize.

Too bad on your birthday for "family-friendly projects."

Pulse/Swimming Pool/Welcome Back, Mr. McDonald/Chaos/Evil Dead Trap

2004-06-06T23:51:00.000-05:00

Pulse
(2001, Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 290)
Swimming Pool
(2003, Francois Ozon, 190)
Welcome Back, Mr. McDonald
(1997, Koki Mitani, 190)
Chaos
(1999, Hideo Nagata, 190)
Evil Dead Trap
(1988, Toshiharu Ikeda, 140)

Here's the skinny: See Pulse. It progresses from loosely connected creep-out vignettes to a full blown ghost apocalypse. The spooky stuff is pretty spooky, but as usual with KK's stuff it's just a way to get the point where he can grind his axe on the real issue: personal isolation and societal decay. Toward the end, the ghosts become less scary than the posited hypothesis: what if we (or Japan, at least) have arrived at the point where the depersonalization created or demanded by the information age is actually viral in nature and is past the turning point? Is further connectivity that is not borne of human contact (internet, mass media) only a source of knowing the despair of others with no chance of relieving it? Does this exacerbate the problem, threatening to spiral into an epidemic of soullessness?

Otherwise, Evil Dead Trap is pretty gory standard slasher stuff up until the last 20 or 30 minutes which are too weird to describe. If that's your bag, go for it.

The Day After Tomorrow

2004-05-31T23:00:00.000-05:00

(Roland Emmerich, 2004, N/A)

To make it clear for Matt: don't go see this movie. It's got big special effects (though, the wolves are terribly done) that look "good" on the big screen. But, so what? It's still not a good movie. OK, OK, if you like seeing things get blowed up read good, then maybe it's for you. While there's no blowed'ing up, there's MEGA-FLOODS! And there's WICKED-ICE!

My advice to miss this one aside, it's always a pleasant surprise to find out a film you've watched is based, in part, on a book co-authored by Art Bell.

Art Bell, of course, had that late night radio show called "Art Bell Coast to Coast" where he'd talk about Chupacabras, psychics, UFOs...all that Fox Mulder shit. I listened to it, from time to time, in high school. Ahh, high school: did I ever tell you I drove a Monte Carlo back then? Surely I have.

Our man Roland Emmerich has several "it's good if you don't care about plot, characters, etc." type movies under his belt, like Stargate and Independence Day, where the Whitehouse gets all blowed up real good like! YEEEE-HAAA!

Like I said, In this movie, New York gets all frozed up real good like. The tidal wave that sweeps over it is the high point. You've probably seen that in the preview, so, really, there's no reason to go see this movie, unless either, (a.) you want to see more of New York flood, or, (b.) you like to keep up with the further adventures of Remy McSwain.

The only other interesting point is the obvious allusion to our fearless leader and his Vice President. The first time we see the President, he's in a track suit, no doubt back from one of his Presidential jogs. And the VP is just a spooky side-of-the-mouth scowl short of looking like Old Man Halliburton.

One last thing: what's up with the gratuitous cancer kid? I can just see a studio executive reading the script or looking over the dailies: "Hmmm... ice storms... floods... teen love... Hmmm... Can we work a cancer kid -- you know, without any hair or eyebrows -- into this somehow. Yeah, I think that'd zing! Oh! Gotta go get lunch with Jerry. In this one Guinevere has a bow! I'm trying to convince him that Merlin needs to be a cross dresser: you know, lets him get close to Arthur despite that papal restraining order or something, so he has to dress like a chamber maid. Has that been done? Well.... Remember: get a cancer kid. ...Zing!"

Troy

2004-05-15T19:57:00.000-05:00

(Wolfgang Petersen, 2004, 150)

Update/Correction: By saying "it's a good summer movie," I mean, "it's a pretty bad movie. That is, It's not good. From now on, perhaps, in addition to the unfathomable rating system, I'll post a simple "good/bad" rating.

Did you know Petersen is (going) to direct Ender's Game? I never read that book, but I remember the dice-nerds always talked about it. I think some non-dice nerds really liked it too.

The previews shown before Troy were almost more fun to watch than the movie itself. Like Troy, the preview set was very, very, very long. As Jay said as the last 3 were starting, "is there another preview?" There was. Several:

- the next Spider Man movie
- Catwoman. This one was fun, someone in the lower row did a "booo" after it and the whole theatre chuckled.
- The Terminal. Tom Hanks is a foreigner stuck in a airport. As someone said when they saw the poster for it outside, "Tom Hanks is always in movies like that."
- some thriller movie.
- that Vin Diesel Chronicles of Riddick thing. His eyes glow! As that food court break-dancer would say, "Vin Diesel 4 Prez!! Rock on."
- Ocean's Twelve: "Twelve is the new eleven."

And then (well, before the previews) there was the 20 minute pre-show advertisements where you get to see two different commercials per each product: Sex in the City, that Sci Fi movie where the dude knows about his death because he read about it in an iBook, and then something about a reality show where they're going to pick a male and female action hero, or stunt people, or yard boys for The Governor of Cally. Oh yeah, and if you're a really hot chick with a can of Diet Coke, you can get behind any velvet ropes.

But, back to Brad Pitt and the Elf guy. First thing, Greek names are confusing: they're all like "Locious" or "Prouiums" or "Agammmeennneronahfuckit." And then, visually, all the guys, except Brad Pitt, look the same -- well, and the guy who played Ajax -- they all have beards and that kind of biker-beer-belly-gonna-beat-you-up-anyway look. Except they're wearing sandals, skirts, and, occasionally, sarongs.

But! The battle scene's were OK. And Peter O'Toole was in it: that was nice. There really wasn't any story. Most folks know the Illiad well enough, but it'd sure be nice to see some more drama and development thereof in the movie. Like, why would Paris and Helen be so in love? Was it a golden apple, a pomegranate, or something to do with crows and livers? Maybe all that whiskey and coffee I drank during those mythology lectures jumbled up my memories, but I recall there being more than shield beating and balls of fire.

That's really about it. Like Bob Mondello said, it's a good summer movie.

More Herk Harvey

2004-05-07T18:04:00.000-05:00

I was looking through the films of Herk Harvey on IMDB, and they seemed kind of weird. After looking at them, I realized that most of them are those PSA-like films of old, e.g., Take a Letter....From A to Z (1967):

The joys of secretarial work as a career for young women are illustrated in this classroom training film. Secretaries (all women) are shown to be the ones who transcribe the ideas of their bosses (all men) into "perfect and permanent form" via the training they get from Gregg Shorthand Books (which just happen to be published by McGraw-Hill, the producers of this film). In addition, this film shows how a good secretary, in addition to her office duties, also knows how to take care of her boss' personal needs, such as getting him coffee and reminding him when to get a haircut. At the end of the film, as a little "bait," the boss is shown with a well-dressed young woman in a mink stole--obviously his wife--who just happened at one time to be his secretary. As the "wife" winks at the secretary, the narrator asks, "Will you be the one that every bright young career man of tomorrow hopes to find?" fronkfob

There are many others such as, Exchanging Greetings and Introductions (1960), Why Study Industrial Arts? (1956), and the oddly titled (and described), To Touch a Child (1962).

In a "review" of A Day of Thanksgiving!, badmovieplanet.com says

A Day of Thanksgiving is one of 400 short subjects directed by Herk Harvey for Centron Productions. Centron was based in Lawrence, Kansas, and specialized in educational, industrial and safety films. They were always highly moralistic, rabidly anti-communist, sort of educational, but always unintentionally hilarious. A quick glance at Harvey's resume and you realize that almost all the short films featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000 were his responsibility

400 films?! Jesus! Apparantly, an hour of these shorts are available on the second disk of the DVD, which I didn't get (having gotten the movie through NetFlix). Anyhow.... Too bad there's not a collection of those shorts, it'd be fun to watch.

Carnival of Souls

2004-05-06T21:40:00.000-05:00

(Herk Harvey, 1962, 210) Interesting side note, it looks like the director, Herk Harvey, died in Burrough's backyard. Not literally, but somewhere in Lawrence, Kansas. I wonder if they knew each other, maybe meeting at the local Shop-n-Save. Formula for a movie Coté will like:

Young people crash into lake, over bridge.
One young person walks out of lake.
Young person moves to another city to pursue career in organ playing.
Young person gets transfixed by deserted carnival on the outskirts of town.
People in black suits and pasty faces with black around their eyes chase young person around.
Yow! Who saw that twist coming?! Well...who back then.

In all honesty, this movie pulls of being pretty God damn creepy. And it has one of those anachronistic characters, a sleazy guy who keeps trying to "bag" the Young Person. I mean, you just don't expect to see a guy barging his way into a ladie's room at 7AM in the morning and preparing some whiskey-coffee for the two of them. Nor try to bust a few moves on her. I thought everyone back then wore double breasted suits and liked Ike. So, the final rating is: good, but, having already seen it, not so good that I'd want to see it again. About 210.

The Hills Have Eyes, Stranger in Our House

2004-05-06T00:21:00.000-05:00

(Wes Craven, 1977 and 1978, 90 and 50) You may be asking, "90? 50? Really?" Yes. Really. Obviously, Wes Craven was sharpening his ax, as it were, with The Hills Have Eyes. Kim had "fond" memories of it, so she'd pumped it up quite a bit. He was still peddling away at that grinding wheel in his next film, the Linda Blair ragin' Cajun witch movie, Stranger in Our House, set on what I envision Rancho del Cielo having looked like at the time. You see, I'm a Texan, and when I hear that someone has a Ranch, my ears can't help put perk up, even though I'm a city-boy to the bone. But then I hear that the "ranch" is in California and I just think, "ahh, shit.... What?" Anyhow, Stranger in Our House has the kind of "ranch" I envision when it's locale is Schwarzenegger-land. Again, let's take the salad bar on approach for The Hills (with Stranger, you're best just to skip a meal):

That funny looking bald dude (John Steadman) always fits into a horror movie nicely.
Check out the men wearing their socks pulled up to their knees. Yuh!
All the bad guys keep saying "Papa Jupe!" I had that stuck in my head for days.

Yeah. Like I said, a 90.

Inferno

2004-05-05T23:58:00.000-05:00

(Dario Argento, 1980, 120) Wow. What happened here? I thought Dario Argento was the shit? We start out strong with the typical European Connection, throw in some Ye Olde Booke Of Spouky Loore, and end up with some guy talking through a reel-to-reel, sounding like that guy on South Park with the black box to the neck thing. Like I said, what happened? Inferno has it's spookey moments, but not really many horror or thriller moments. Like the NetFlix summary says, there is a good death by mob of cats, but there aren't many other good kill scenes. While I'm on the topic of kill scenes, have you seen Resident Evil? I was just telling some folks at lunch today how that was a great zombie movie, if only for the elevator-cum-guillotine sequence. And, as Matt pointed out, how 'bout that laser? Like The Cube but better! Man, talk about your Skynet gone bad template...that one's a winner. Anyhow, back to the early 80's, the days when it made scene to call a woman's shirt a "blouse"... I still have high hopes for the rest of Argento's movies, but this one is, well, a little 120. One of the IMDB reviews says it best "Despite it's flaws, Inferno is probably the best 'architectural' horror movie ever made." Point being, "architecture" and "horror" don't really go together. Haunted house? Sure, but that's the ghosts, man. Hidden passage ways and sliding doors: brother, you might as well rewind time a 100 odd years, wall up a cat in a wall, and try to scare someone with that. See if you can get some sharp thing swaying back and forth over a naked lady too. Oooooo! Spoooky!

Mephisto

2004-05-05T23:34:00.000-05:00

(Istvan Szabo, 1981, 180) I wasn't sure if this was a movie about the worst mime makeup job ever, and the revenge the mime takes on the makeup artist -- traps him in a box or a gush of wind or whatever -- or something to do with Nazis and drama nerds. Turns out it was more the second than the first. Around the time Schindler's List came out, Mason commented to me one day, "I don't want to see Nazi movies anymore. They're too depressing." He really meant serious Nazi movies: Indiana Jones Nazi movies OK; Pianist Nazi movies way too depressing. I tend to follow the same rule. Nonetheless, this Nazi movie was bearable, probably because most of the Nazi'ing happened in fancy galas and wood paneled offices. There's something about their powder blue uniforms that helped diffuse all that nasty Naziness. More importantly, and at the risk of sounding corny, the actor (Klaus Maria Brandauer) playing the main character Hendrik Hoefgen, is fantastic: he can go from a calm theatre director to a raving, socialist, drama nerd in a split second and look good and real doing it. Like most furin' movies I end up seeing, this one just ends all the sudden. I guess we're supposed to "fill in the rest" ourselves or take the time to "think" about the film. Or maybe there's something that makes a film more real if it doesn't have a tight little ending. I have no idea, but it'd be nice to know what happened to the worst mime makeup job ever.

The Devil's Backbone

2004-05-05T23:13:00.000-05:00

(Guillermo del Toro, 2001, 175) To be honest, I had a hankerin' to go see Hellboy. At first, it seemed like it'd be silly just because of the name. Then, I saw a preview and it looked entertaining enough. After it was out awhile, pretty much everyone gave it the "eh <shrug>" review, so I figure I'll just wait 'till I happen to catch it some Thanksgiving when I'm dozing off on the couch. (It may sound like liminal-sleeping and movie watching go hand-in-hand in Coté land, but that's not always the case.) Anyhow, before that full cycle, I put a couple of del Toro's films on the NetFlix queue. The first one I got was The Devil's Backbone. It's a great film visually, but the story is a bit weak. There's one ghost/zombie who looks pretty awesome, to put it in less than urbane terms. He's got a huge gash on his head and whenever he's walking around, there's blood kind of flowing upwards from it. The sets, costumes, and lighting are all nice and twilighty, and despite being a fool for any movie set in 1930's Spain -- the film comes complete with an unexploded bomb in the court yard and a few mentions of "The Cause" -- I'd have to say this one wasn't much special. But, for looking good, it gets some extra credit.

A little more nudity, and now we've got a ballgame (Man on Fire)

2004-05-05T22:49:00.000-05:00

Man on Fire (Tony Scott, 2004, 150) We were so close to having something worthwhile here. I've always been interested in the Angel of VengeanceTM movie. You know what I'm talking about-- the badass comes in and slaughters the bad guys who done wrong in Act I. Not that they've necessarily done him wrong (though that's often involved), but more importantly they've sinned and must pay. The badass is God's own hand, come to pound 'em into oblivion. Of course there's an element of this in the billions of movies with GOOD GUYS VS BAD GUYS, right? They're GOOD because they defeat the BAD. But the more complex film will attempt to deconstruct the Angel back into a human and push the Vengeance from the cool into the cold. Is this good guy really that good when his extraordinary talent is for killing other people? What are we doing when we root for these scumbags to get killed? But MOF pulls too many punches. The film is too slick, an action flick. There are too many quips a la Bond (One good one that works in both types of movies goes something like "Forgiveness is between him and God. It's my job to arrange the meeting.") And when it's time for Denzel to dish out the really dark stuff, nada. Whenever a woman is in the path of his violence, he relents, letting her/him/us off the hook. It all turns into the standard redemption story (I like those, too) when it could have been more: a questioning of why we need those stories.

I just saw that it's a remake of a 1987 Scott Glenn movie. I gotta see that one!

Back in black! Brecht! Braque! I killed you, you bastard! Where's my Wild Turkey?!

2004-05-05T22:40:00.000-05:00

I've gotten responses from others that DILLWEED should stay up regardless of whether I make it consumer-friendly or not. So I guess posts will resume.

2004-05-05T21:44:00.000-05:00

The Legend of Hell House (John Hough, 1973, 107) The Legend of Hell House is a yawner of a horror film. It's fine if you've just had a large dinner and some heavy ice-cream, and want something soothing to go sleep to. In fact, it's not much of a horror film at all. It's more like an English film. Except, in this one, they're not all that Hugh Grant character accidentally walking into rooms and going "Oh! Terribly sorry! Excuse me!" and quickly closing the doors, they're the wise-ass, I'm smarter than you British archetype. In fact, for the first 30 minutes the only talking one of the characters, Fischer, does is along the lines of:

Barrett: I expect to be out of this hour in 4 days. Fischer: Do you really? [Or] Barrett: There is no such thing as life after death! Fischer: Are you so sure?

With a movie like this, you have to take the salad bar approach, and just pick out the parts that are good, leaving those nasty looking boiled eggs and potato salad behind. Best scenes:

As Mrs. Barrett is sleeping, the shadows on the ceiling from a small statue of a satyr and woman (the Barretts have a cracking fire going in their room) begin to move, all moaning and sensual.
During a "physical disturbance" a wooden board with spikes driven through it, being used, I guess, to serve the pieces of meat stuck on the spikes, flies at Barrett, sticking into the chair. What kind of whacky English dish is that?
At the end, they find that Belasco has preserved himself in a secret room. He's seen fit to sit himself upright in a chair with smoking jacket and large snifty of brandy forever nestled in his hand. Take that Walt Disney!
A ghost hides in under the covers of Florence's bed. She nonchalantly starts talking to it, and then pulls off the covers. Of course there's nothing there, but then she just happily goes to sleep with no worries about the ghost.

Well, at least Roddy McDowall gets to take off the ape suit.

2004-05-05T21:41:00.000-05:00

Since joining NetFlix, I've been seeing a lot of movies recently. I asked Chip to add me to this good old DILLWEED so's I'd have a place to post movie reviews. See DrunkAndRetired.com for more about me if you're dying to know.

2004-03-29T23:45:00.000-06:00

Dive! Dive! Dillweed is going down. Blogging only on movies seems to have created an unintended contract with a friend or two. So I'm moving to the standard format where hopefully I'm not expected to get all Eberty when I mention a movie. Merry Christmas.

2004-03-22T09:28:00.000-06:00

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (Michel Gondry, 2004, 280) Cries and Whisper (Ingmar Bergman, 1972, 170) Simple Men (Hal Hartley, 1992, 250)

2004-03-16T10:19:00.000-06:00

Contempt (Jean-Luc Godard, 1963, 240) Public Domain (Kris Lefcoe, 2004, 110)

2004-03-14T16:02:00.000-06:00

Spartan (David Mamet, 2004, 190) Love Me If You Dare (Yann Samuell, 2004, 150) Luck (Peter Wellington, 2004, 190) Starsky and Hutch (Todd Phillips, 2004, 100) It seems that this weekend everything's coming up neuroses. First, David Mamet once again visits his paranoiac vision on the local art-plex in the form of Spartan, another of his serpentine heist pics, this time dressed up in an GI Joe action outfit. The breakdown: Super Special Ops Marine and modern day Samurai Val Kilmer navigates his way through dastardly slave-trading Arabs and even more dastardly White House advisers to rescue the President's daughter. The wandering warrior story usually seems to go one of two ways-- the warrior's strict adherence to his code allows him to expose the system that's trying to corrupt that code, or more cynically (70's style), the warrior is crushed by the system but he's still got that code, goddammit. Interestingly (to me), Spartan doesn't go either way but pulls the classic enlightenment move by having the Samurai compromise the code in exchange for more human qualities, but then again Mamet doesn't portray this as a beneficial spiritual transformation, but just one more sacrifice demanded by an unjust system. Of course, in real life, I would think the fucker was borderline psychotic to begin with. The romantic comedy(?) Love Me If You Dare treads the ground better trodden by Roman Polanski's Bitter Moon. A boy and girl develop a relationship around a game in which each has to perform the dares suggested by the other. As they grow older and develop feelings for each other, they don't know how to react to each other's advances outside the strictures of the game. A lot of hurt feelings later, the game devolves into tit-for-tat humiliations and assaults. I don't know. Maybe it's a depressing metaphor for the automatism in human relationships. For a romantic comedy, it definitely could have been more romantic. And funnier. Luck is a paeon to gambling addiction. The main character pisses aways his life with his dead-end drudgery (crappy job, loser friends) instead of taking on what he obviously desires (writing, the girl he has crush on). When he screws up his shot with the girl, he turns to gambling just to feel something go his way. An early streak gets him hooked, but not just on winning but on cheating fate, destiny, common sense, and everyone else on the planet. It's as if it's a sin not to believe that this hand will win. I suggest checking it out while it's playing in town during SXSW. Starsky and Hutch is a remake of Serpico with Ben Stiller playing Pacino's hair and Owen Wilson playing his nose. Merry Christmas.

2004-03-10T11:16:00.000-06:00

How Green Was My Valley (1941, John Ford, 250)

2004-03-09T08:48:00.000-06:00

Black Orpheus (1959, Marcel Camus, 225)

2004-03-01T23:15:00.000-06:00

Fog of War (2003, Errol Morris, 275) American Splendor (2003, Shari Springer Berman & Robert Pulcini, 275) What's Up, Fatlip? (2000?/2003?, Spike Jonze, 225) Whichard and I were talking yesterday about all the excitement surrounding The Passion of the Christ. I'm not extremely jazzed to see it, mainly because its attempt at literalism turns me off. I know the story of Christ. I was raised in fundamentalist Southern Baptist churches and I've seen my share of Passion plays. I don't need a blow-by-blow replay of a story I know very well. Marich asked why it's different than other attempts to filmically document historical events. My response would be that Passion is an attempt to replay the exact same narrative record, but the point is well taken. Perhaps the visceral effect of taking it in through the eyes would produce a different reaction that would be of value. Because of Passion, I'm sure that many people are thinking about the relationship between film and reality. I am, too, after seeing/watching two documentaries and something like a documentary but not. What's Up, Fatlip? is a documentary by Spike Jonze following the rapper Fatlip during the shooting of the video of the song with the same name. The song is a comic yet somehow poignant deflation of the rap star image, a bit of honest introspection from someone on the downhill slide from success. The 30 minute film definitely bears witness that the lyrics are true. Fog of War, which won the Oscar last night, is Robert McNamara's reassessment of his moral culpability in both the bombing of Japan and his orchestration of the Vietnam War. American Splendor is based on Harvey Pekar's underground comic series of the same name. The comics were meant to be a strict retelling of the day-to-day events of Pekar's life, so the movie is, too. In fact, after some scenes, they bring out the real people being portrayed, who then talk about the actual events. It makes the film almost "more real" than a documentary because the the relationship between what is represented and what is real is always in the foreground. Most documentaries are constructed to produce a feeling that what you see is an artifact of the real events. American Splendor acknowledges that film can never be an unprocessed representation of reality, and in doing so, earns your trust.

2004-02-25T22:32:00.000-06:00

Children of Paradise (Les Enfants du Paradis) (1946, Marcel Carne, 250) Children of Paradise is the French epic, their Gone with the Wind. It's a three hour melodrama in 2 parts that borders on allegory. Three major male characters, all artists of some sort, all revolve around the main female character who is repeatedly referred to as Truth or Beauty. Ugh. A quick rundown of the plot: Meet Frederick. Frederick is an ambitious actor and philanderer. Freddy macks on Garance, who is beautiful, carefree, wise, and basically a prostitute. Garance blows him off (but not permanently). Garance sometimes hangs out with Lacenaire, a cold-hearted thief with a talent for writing, a thirst for fame, and the greasiest hairdo ever. In one preposterous episode, Lacenaire's theft of a man's watch is attributed to Garance. How is she saved? The police and onlookers are convinced she is innocent by the brilliant performance of Baptiste, the mime. Yes, that says mime. Christ, did I say I liked this movie? Of course, Baptiste is instantly taken with everyone's favorite hooker. I don't know which is less believable-- Garance's rescue or that a mime named Baptiste is a heterosexual. Flash forward a bit and Frederick and Baptiste are knockin' 'em dead at the Funambules Theatre with their mime act but Frederick longs for parts in which he talks and ones, I assume, in which doesn't look like an idiot. Oh, did I mention that Baptiste is madly in love with Garance but she's banging Frederick? Those crazy French bastards! Some rich asshole, the Count du Montray, wants to shower her with gifts but she blows him off (but not permanently). As part one comes to a close, Garance once again is wrongly accused of being involved in one of Lacenaire's schemes, but there are no mimes around this time. Crafty skank she is, she calls on the Count to get her out of the pickle. As part two starts, it's six years later and everyone's seems happy. Frederick is now Paris's most popular actor and Baptiste is Paris's most popular guy who plays with imaginary rope. Unbeknownst to the now-domestic Baptiste, Garance has always loved him and has been coming to see his performances since she came into town with her duel-happy sugar daddy. Frederick finds this out and tells Baptiste, who is now ready to chuck his wife and kid to be with her (Isn't that romantic?). Baptiste plans to tell Garance of his passion at Fred's rendition of Othello that she will be attending with the Count. After the show, Garance and Baptiste are smooching on the balcony while just inside, the Count, in his nonplussed jealous overheating, is attempting to insult Frederick, Lacenaire, and even Shakespeare. Lacenaire doesn't like it and makes a grand show of revealing the secret lovers to the profound embarrassment of the Count. At this point, the Count challenges neither Lacenaire nor Baptiste, but Frederick to a duel. Huh? Anyway, before the duel can occur, Lacenaire finds the Count and kills him for the fame and glory. In the final scenes, Mrs. Mime catches Baptiste with Garance, Garance flees, Baptiste pursues, but Baptiste cannot fight through the crowd to catch his ho-bag. After my initial viewing, I can see Lacenaire as a representation of the authors of the film. But that is pretentious crap for another time. I bid you adieu, mon capitain cheri amour.

2004-02-17T21:26:00.000-06:00

Annual Oscar predictions Best Actor: will win - Sean Penn, Mystic River should win - Bill Murray, Lost in Translation should have been nominated - Billy Bob Thornton, Bad Santa Best Actress: will win - Charlize Theron, Monster should win - i only saw one of these. Naomi Watts was pretty good in 21 Grams should have been nominated - Scarlett Johanssen, Lost in Translation (DUH!) Best Supp. Actor: will win - Alec Baldwin, The Cooler should win - Alec Baldwin, The Cooler should have been nominated - Willem Dafoe, Finding Nemo Best Supp. Actress: will win - Renee Zellweger, Cold Mountain should win - i only saw one of these. Marcia Gay Harden was pretty good in Mystic River. should have been nominated - Joan Cusack, School of Rock Best Original Screenplay: will win - Lost in Translation should win - Lost in Translation should have been nominated - All or Nothing Best Adapted Screenplay: will win - Mystic River should win - Mystic River should have been nominated - Spider Best Director: will win - Peter Jackson, Lord of the Rings: Return of the King should win - Sofia Coppola, Lost in Translation should have been nominated - David Gordon Green, All the Real Girls Best Film: will win - Lord of the Rings: Return of the King should win - Lost in Translation should have been nominated - All the Real Girls The best 5 movies I saw released in 2003: Lost in Translation Bright Future Bad Santa All or Nothing All the Real Girls

2004-02-16T11:32:00.000-06:00

Beauty and the Beast (1947, Jean Cocteau, 250)

2004-02-15T18:07:00.000-06:00

Lost in Translation (2003, Sofia Coppola, 290) The best film nominated for Best Picture this year, which guarantees that it will win the Best Original Screenplay award and nothing else. The Passion of Joan of Arc (1928, Carl Theodor Dreyer, 300)

2004-02-12T08:45:00.000-06:00

Intolerable Cruelty (2003, Joel Coen, 250) Howard Hawks and Preston Sturges had a baby and that baby split into two babies named Joel and Ethan Coen.

2004-02-11T09:06:00.000-06:00

The Civil War (1989, Ken Burns, 275) I got rooked. Jude Law wasn't in this bitch once. Adaptation (2002, Spike Jonze, 300) i loves me some self-reflexive writin'. oh yeah, this, too.

2004-02-02T22:00:00.000-06:00

Coup de Grace (1976, Volker Schlondorff, 100) Goofy Sturm und Drang with a dopey kicker. Exactly what most non-cineastes hate about much of European cinema. The Bicycle Thief (1948, Vittorio de Sica, 225) Simple story: poor guy needs bike for job, poor guy gets bike out of hock with last bit o' money, asshole steals bike, guy looks for bike, guy winds up stealing a bike out of desperation. Pretty ironic, huh? Not the feel-good hit of the summer. Nights of Cabiria (1957, Federico Fellini, 325) I started writing this by describing the Italian neorealism movement and Fellini's break with it, but none of it means squat compared to this: the last scene (and I mean the last 30 seconds or so) of this film is one of the 2 or 3 most effective movie moments I have ever experienced.

2004-01-29T16:10:00.000-06:00

Seance (2000, Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 250) Once again, kickin' it K-school. Authentically creepy. KK has the blissful habit of taking the soundtrack to almost nada for stretches. I like it. I'm tired of all this music. Everywhere I go there's always music playing as if I need a soundtrack to my life. A nifty idea, I guess-- IF I PICK THE TUNES. I used to like the Rolling Stones' "Angie" but cringe when I hear it now, because I heard it constantly over the Randall's intercom when I worked at an in-the-store bank. It seems I remember a David Mamet essay (in The Cabin?) where he rails against this very phenomenon. Anyway, it's more insidious in the movies (especially horror) because music is often a crutch for a filmmaker that can't effect the correct emotional response via the narrative. Charisma (1999, Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 50) Authentically weird. I'm not afraid to say it-- I don't get it. There's a tree, a guy, nuclear weapons, and a lot of crazy shite. City on Fire (1987, Ringo Lam, 100) There are obvious similarities to Reservoir Dogs. 70s movie producer power couple Michael & Julia Philips got into some kind of row with Tarantino and fired a pretty scathing missive to Premiere in which they claimed Reservoir Dogs was virtually a line-by-line ripoff of City on Fire (as well as attributing most of Pulp Fiction to Roger Avary). Ever since then, I've wanted to see CoF, but only now got around to it. My verdict: There are definitely some components of RD that must have come from CoF: the failed jewelry heist, the undercover cop torn by his new-found devotion to his robber friend, and the climax with guns in everyone's faces. Things in RD not present in CoF: an interesting temporal structure, much better dialogue, and a plot so tight you could bounce a quarter off it. Ripoff? Maybe. Definitely not line-by-line, though. RD is just a much better movie, period.

2004-01-26T14:56:00.000-06:00

Lunt says I have to rate these films. I don't know why but I'll go back and rate everything on a scale from 0 to 373 in tribute to Lord Kelvin.

2004-01-26T09:55:00.000-06:00

The Butterfly Effect (2004, who gives a shit, 50) Someday I'll come back and write something about my theory on how this movie is "morally disjoint" (sorry, it's the only thing i could come up with). Call me an elitist, but I just don't want to see a Ashton Kutcher time-travel movie that uses pedophilia, prostitution, cancer, and blowing up infants as plot devices.

2004-01-21T10:22:00.000-06:00

Crash (1996, David Cronenberg, 150)

2004-01-19T09:35:00.000-06:00

Pirates of the Caribbean (2003, Gore Verbinski, 75) The shots of the (assumedly) Caribbean islands were stunning on a big tv (65'' 16x9). Chungking Express (1994, Wong Kar-Wai, 300) I watched it again to get ready for Fallen Angels. The second story with Faye Wong and Tony Leung is one of my all-time favorite pieces of moviemaking. Fallen Angels (1996, Wong Kar-Wai, 200) The Cooler (2003, Wayne Kramer, 200) I like the balls Kramer shows in making the reality of "cooling" the central conceit. Alec Baldwin shows the ass-kicking chops he made famous in Glengarry Glen Ross .

2004-01-16T09:06:00.000-06:00

Bright Future (2003, Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 300) K. Kurosawa is rising fast on my list of favorite directors.

2004-01-15T09:06:00.000-06:00

Battle Royale (2000, Kinji Fukasaku, 125) What the fuck is going on in Japan? George Washington (2001, David Gordon Green, 300) I saw All the Real Girls before this, so I had a heads up. I love Malick and I love this.

2004-01-12T12:54:00.000-06:00

The Brood (1980?, David Cronenberg, 200) Dr Raglin: Ben. Ben: Dr Raglin? Dr Raglin: Ben. Ben: Dr Raglin. (pause) Dr Raglin: Ben, I've got one word for you. Ben: Sir? Dr Raglin: Psychoplasmics. (they look at each other for a moment) Ben: Exactly how do you mean, sir? All or Nothing (2003, Mike Leigh, 250) I remember reading this Garry Wills article in The Atlantic years ago in which he said that Oliver Stone was such a great filmmaker and that he was making the film equivalent of novels. I didn't get it then and I don't get it now. Leigh seems to fit that description better. This is one more film in the Leigh mold, so if you like the mold... In a Lonely Place (1950, Nicholas Ray, 225) The perfect companion piece to Sunset Boulevard. As their heyday started to fade, film noirs (shouldn't that be films noir?) got more and more whack. 1950 gave us these two examples, both with screenwriters as the protagonist. Of course, leave it to Ray to upend the genre by smacking the audience with a ending that indicts the allure of the noir hero.

2004-01-09T09:40:00.000-06:00

catching up... Cure (1998, Kiyoshi Kurosawa, 300) Lola Montes (1950, Max Ophuls, 150) I liked it much better when I thought the circus scenes were fantasy. Forever Mine (2001, Paul Schrader, 150) Too much soap for my tastes. I like my Schrader grittier. Gretchen Mol is hot as all get-out. Goodbye South Goodbye (1996, Hao Hsiao-Hsien, 175) In the Mood for Love (2001, Wong Kar-wai, 325) As Tears Go By (1990, Wong Kar-wai, 125) Dressed To Kill (1980, Brian DePalma, 100) I'm either too dumb or too smart for DePalma films. I haven't figured out which. Flowers of Shanghai (1997, Hao Hsiao-Hsien, 300) Bad Santa (2003, Terry Zwigoff, 275) if you don't hit this shit, i got no sympathy. Last Samurai (2003, Edward Zwick, 75) Everything that is wrong with American film at this point in time. Lord Of The Rings: Return of the King (2003, Peter Jackson, 100) Things I don't want to see for another fifty years: massive battle scenes, hobbit-on-hobbit hugging, knowing looks from wise old wizards, 3 hour fantasy movies.

2003-11-17T07:57:00.000-06:00

Naked Lunch (1991, David Cronenberg, 300)

2003-11-12T08:59:00.000-06:00

Nazarin (1958, Luis Bunuel, 250) Cool thing about this movie? Made by anti-Church Bunuel and officially considered a Catholic film by the Vatican. And I totally get that! The running theme in Christianity is that the World just doesn't get it. Everyone sees the same film and some think the priest a fool and some think him divine. Light Sleeper (1992, Paul Schrader, 250)